I get it (or at least some of it).
What do I get? I think I understand how the reactions and responses don't really sync with what is intended with some very important people in my life. Specifically Judy and you.
Since our visit in August Judy and I have had several head to heads which are very unpleasant. I actually finally put it in these terms: "Are you on my team or not?".
The reason I expressed it in those terms is that I could not understand why pretty much every general comment I would make would be responded to in an adversarial way. Since I was not attacking her, I thought it was weird that she would turn the comment into a personal battlefield. It was very hurtful.
Some of the lack of team unity has been manifested over the years with me allowing this disunity to continue. An example is Judy not supporting NLPC in its early years, instead, taking the three of you to a local church. In an attempt to get along I allowed this obvious fragmentation.
Another example is that I wanted the three of you home-schooled but Judy wanted you to be a part of the community. I caved in order to get along.
So, these and other battle-grounds that I ceded only served to keep us on a team in disunity. I did not recognize the damage that was being done.
Specifically, I see the battle lines in our world purely in spiritual terms.
This clarity is both good from a ministerial standpoint, but it is burdensome from an interpersonal one.
Now, my hobbies and interests give me a break from the burden aspect of it. Nevertheless, when I am faced with a snippet of news events, I immediately go into to spiritual analysis mode. It is a trigger of sorts which, though it may seem that I am upset, it is more like I am energized - to come against the enemy.
So, this aspect of my walk with the Lord is one which can be off-putting to those who just want to get along, live life and roll with the punches. I get it.
With respect to the battles with Judy, I am going to have to stop sharing anything that is politically related. I did not realize until now, that when she was attacking me, she was simply saying I don't want to hear it. I can relate to that because I don't expose myself to things that are upsetting.
She and Liz have spats for the same reason. Liz says something that Judy does not want to hear or disagrees with and it turns into an argument as Liz feels attacked, threatened.
I will talk to Liz about my revelation so that she is better prepared to these blindside attacks.
Unfortunately, Judy does not converse very much so I can see us spending a lot of time just being and not talking, particularly if I shy away from the things that are on my mind, my perceptions, my opinions.
So be it.
Now, with respect to our relationship.
From what I have been able to deduce, our conflicts are largely along the same lines. I say or do something that is upsetting to you whether it directly involved you or not, and we end up in an argument which, as is the case with Judy, I do not understand.
I want you to be happy and healthy. So, I don't not contact you because of any animosity. I am just afraid that such contact is not welcomed or not helpful to you.
Henceforth, I will try to be more sensitive about sharing my opinions with you and we can talk about whatever you want to talk about or not.
Lastly, I am for you and your family. I will never subtly attack you or try to undermine your peace. If I ever attack you it will be an obvious attack. I don't prevaricate.
If you want to know my opinions, they are on Social Media and they are on my website Randy@LucasCo.Info under News!.
With all this being said, I hope you, Sarah, Oscar and Frankie have a wonderful 2025.
Love you.